Now is Never Enough

Three weeks had past after Ailey received a reply from Tobias. She had to plan her visit to him very carefully. If Jasper found out… she shook her head. Not that it mattered anyway. Soon enough they’d have to tell everyone the truth of their relationship. She was tired of living a lie… as the thought crossed her mind, she looked at her packed bag. Jasper and the kids thought she was going away for work. She wished she could tell them, but to do so could ruin everything - and the most important person in her life, apart from her infant daughters, was Melody.

Ailey walked into Shiloh and Ceres’ nursery and planted kisses on their foreheads. If only they had waited a few more years and didn’t have to live in a world where dark forces were still around and where mommy’s and daddy’s waited until they were absolutely ready to have babies. But no matter what, she only wanted to give them the world. Her eyes filled with tears as she walked away… in the five months of their existence, this was the first time she had been away from them for more than six hours.

Jasper was gone - as he always was, but Maelynn was around to still watch them. Ailey had a feeling she knew something was wrong, but her lips were sealed. She hugged her sister goodbye and grabbed her bag, and without thinking much of it, she walked out of the house and into the back garden, where she apparated away with a sniff.

Because apparition over long distances was dangerous and Ailey was never really good at it, it took her a few days to get to where he told her to meet her. Bedraggled and ready for a bath, she waited underneath a sign written in German (with a wrench in her heart) for the familiar face to come.

The truth was that Ailey didn’t want to see him. She didn’t want to be near him. The last time they saw each other was because of Peter. Seeing him reminded her of a time she didn’t want to think about, when she did things she didn’t want to do. But everyone had their regrets.

She fiddled with the wand in her pocket, waiting. Muggles bustled about speaking in rapid German. Apparently this was a popular tourist spot, which seemed strange for him… but she learned to just accept what ever happened when it came to Tobias.

An hour later, a familiar tall shape appeared. As usually, he was dressed up in clever Muggle attire. He looked as if he was ready to lead a business meeting, not take down the government. Her heart felt as if it had stopped when she saw him, but there was nothing she could do, there was no turning back. Ailey raised her hand, and a moment later he took it in his.

They spun on the spot just as a group of Muggles boarded a bus and drove away. Seconds later, they appeared on the doorstep of a cottage in the middle of a thicket of trees. Tobias didn’t speak a word, as his door flung open (wandless) and led her in. He still clung to her hand as she crossed over the threshold. It took her a minute to gather her bearings before letting go and staring at the door. Melody and Mordred were due to arrive at any moment.

Mordred nervously paced around his flat in Hogsmeade. He looked around the room which was still quite bare. He hadn’t had much of a chance to decorate or ever try to make the place look nice. Yes he had been there for six months but life didn’t feel much easier. For all but the beginning eight years of his life he lived in fear. Constant fear that never went away. Constant pain and constant suffering. All because of a mistake his father made. Why was the one who had to suffer? He hated that it had to be him but at the same time, he was glad it was him. He couldn’t imagine Melody being the one who fell victim to Tony. Or his recently discovered siblings; Abigail, Abetha, and Edmond. He couldn’t imagine them going through the same pain he went through and he hoped they never ever had to. No one should ever to have to go through what he went through. He would protect his family with his life.

He couldn’t stop looking at himself in the mirror. He was nervous about how he looked. Not looking in a mirror for about 20 years did that to him. Not knowing what he looked like for so long. What he hated the most was his permanently bruised and scarred wrists. He would always wear long sleeve shirts to cover it up but most of them it didn’t cover it up. He sighed as he looked in the mirror and held the ends of his sleeves in his hands. He nervously bit his lip and ruffled his thick black hair.

A sudden knock on the door made him jump. After another second, Melody entered with that beautiful smile on her face. Her smile always made Mordred smile. It was so warm and happy. Even in this time of fear and uncertainty she could still smile. Mordred felt Melody’s arms wrap around him tightly. He wrapped his arms around and rested his chin on the top of her head. She was quite a few inches shorter than him and he loved to rub it in every once a while.

“Hey, Mel.” Mordred said softly. He looked at his sister and forced out a smile smile. Today they would be visiting her best friend, Ailey Saunders and her friend Tobias to help their memories. Anything that had been lost would be returned to them. Mordred was happy to be able to remember what was lost but he feared it at the same time. What had he forgotten? Was it something he wanted to know? He spent many months talking with Melody about this and they finally agreed they should get their memories back. It was one of the hardest decisions had ever had to make and he still wasn’t sure if it was the right decision.

“You ready?” That warm voice filled Mordred’s ears which made a small smile form on his face. He gave a small nod. Unlike Melody, Mordred didn’t talk much. He was afraid of saying something wrong or hurting someone’s feelings. He had said many wrong things around Tony during the first few years and he learned his lesson quickly.

Not knowing how to apparate yet, Mordred took Melody’s hand and waited for her to apparate to the home where they would be meeting. With a sudden loud noise all of the familiar surroundings of his flat turned into a strange looking forest. A cottage was sitting in front of them. Mordred almost fell over. He wasn’t used to apparation. He felt Melody catch him with a smile and small chuckle. “You okay?” She asked looking at him. He nodded back down at her with his regular small smile.

Mordred felt himself being softly pulled by Melody up to the door. It was hard for him to get his feet to move. He was about to be confronted by two people he hardly knew who would mess with his head. Mordred trusted Melody her comfort and trust with her best friend. He knew today wouldn’t be easy but he hoped it would answer a few questions.

Today was a big for Melody and her brother. Today, her bestest friend Ailey Sanders and her friend would be restoring her memory. The first five years of her life with her brother would return to her. She couldn’t even begin to imagine all of the wonderful times she missed with him. She couldn’t wait to have those memories return to her. She was also a little afraid. What if it made her long to grow up with Mordred even more? What if it made her hate her childhood? What if it gave her regret? She knew that whatever happened, she had Mordred with her. He was safe and he was okay. That’s all she cared about. She wasn’t about to let him get hurt again.

She strolled into Hogsmeade and up to her brother’s flat. It was the same flat that she had lived in when she lived in Hogsmeade. She chuckled to herself when she saw a small Halloween decoration on the door. Mordred knew how much Halloween made her smile. She knocked lightly on the door and waited a few moments before entering. She was always sure to keep a warm smile on her face while she was around Mordred. He was around so much crap for his whole life and she was sure it was nice to see a smile.

Melody walked up to her brother and hugged him tightly. She felt him rest his chin on her head. She sighed softly. That was a subtle sign of him teasing her about her height. “You ready?” She asked still with a smile. Melody saw that small nod from Mordred. She smiled back at him and took his hand. She gave Mordred a few seconds to prepare himself before apparating away.

Soon after reaching the ground again, Melody felt Mordred stumble. She caught him so he wouldn’t fall. “You okay?” Melody saw that smile and nod once again. She wished he would talk to her but she knew it was something that would take time. He went through a lot and she didn’t expect much from him.

Melody took Mordred’s hand and gently pulled him towards the door. She knew if he could stand for hours or run away he would. This was a hard decision for the both of them and she wasn’t sure if she was ready to do this herself. She took a deep breath before knocking on the door and waiting for Ailey to answer. She felt her heart beating hard in her chest. It was finally happening. This was real and she couldn’t back out now.

Tobias felt his heart stop when he saw her. He had to stand back in a crowd of Muggles to watch her for awhile. To see how she has changed… to see if she was happy. There was something about the way she carried herself that always felt like she was holding the weight of the world on her shoulders. But now, now she seemed depressed… and deflated. Her blonde hair lay lank on her shoulders and her eyes seemed unfocused, as if her thoughts were a million miles away.

It felt so strange to not be a part of her world. He had no idea who this bloke was that she was engaged to or what he meant to her. Jack was the one who told him - who found out obviously, from Jamison. But that was all he knew, other than the fostering of Peter and the job at Hogwarts.

He stood behind and watched her and soon the crowd surrounding him started to thin. They were moving towards a bus, most likely on an exploration to visit the ‘fabled’ Hansel and Gretel house. If only they knew. Silly Muggles.

An hour had past as he stood by watching her, studying her every move. She was fidgeting, frequently sticking her hand in her pocket, most likely holding onto her wand. But she never left, not once. Deciding it was finally the right time, Tobias stepped out from behind an old Muggle couple and slowly walked over to her. His thoughts started racing. What was he going to say? “How are you” seemed too simple. Should he hug her? No, he was never one for hugs… and the time between them was too weird. His heart beat against his chest like a drummer on his closing set, ready to be free - but too scared for what was coming next. And before he knew it, she was lifting her tiny hand to wave at him, and he panicked, his breath was caught in his lungs. He suddenly forgot what it felt like to breathe, to talk, to be alive and all he could do was grab her hand - and bam.

They apparated away. It wasn’t his intention. What if the Muggles had seen them? It took a moment for his eyes to adjust from the light to the dark underneath the canopy of the trees. Ailey was standing beside him, hand still in his, rubbing her own eyes. He didn’t say a word as he stepped forward and watched as his front door sprung open.

Although Ailey and Tobias stood a foot away from each other, all of time of space felt as if it were between them. She let go of his hand and he stepped even further back, deepening the divide.

“Uhh…” was all he managed to say. Ailey looked at him expectantly, but didn’t push or judge. He wondered if this was just as weird for her as it was for him. He found himself glancing at her finger, at a shiny ring. The words caught in his throat when he pointed at it. But he had to know.
“Congratulations,” he muttered, “What’s his name?”  What’s his name? What a stupid question. He bit the inside of his cheek and felt the iron-y taste of blood fill his mouth.

Ailey looked at him with a sad smile. “His name is Jasper Gray.”

There were no other words to say. He just glanced at her, wondering what this Jasper Gray did. The only Gray he knew was one that was a rather well known Magizoologist, but he was old, and Tobias doubted that was him.

At that very moment, a light knock sounded at the door. Tobias instinctively froze. Nobody ever knocked at his door. Whenever his mother or Jack came to visit, Tobias always met them somewhere else before apparating them himself to his home. It was too risky otherwise… but this time it was different, no matter how panicky it made him feel. This man that needed Tobias and Ailey was very ill - to what extent he did not know, but it was a dangerous, a very dangerous, and a very very illegal situation.

Ailey looked at him and he looked at her. He stepped forward, straightening out his tie, and put his hand on the doorknob.

Ailey was too tired to try. After everything she was going through with Jasper, after spending much more time with the twins than he did, and after all of the recent changes in the Ministry of Magic and the Headmaster position within Hogwarts - she was absolutely exhausted.

She had no energy to play catch up with Tobias. It was none of his business who Jasper was or that she had two innocent baby girls at home, unused to not being with their mother. Her heart panged as she thought about her precious babies, who were still so tiny from being born so early.

He probably wanted to hear more, but she didn’t want to say more. She doubted it would stay like that over the next few weeks, as they worked on everything with Melody and Mordred… Ailey wasn’t one to stay quiet for long.

The moment Ailey saw Melody’s face, tears stung her pale eyes and she sprinted forward, wrapping her arms around her. “I’ve missed you, so much,” she cried. Both Melody and Ailey had been very busy… it was rare, since the twins had come around and since Mordred’s return that they saw each other even once a week.

After embracing, Ailey remembered where they were and why they were there. A handsome unfamiliar face stood behind her, very clearly feeling worried and out of place. Ailey stepped back from Melody and smiled kindly at Mordred. She wasn’t sure what to do, she was usually someone that liked to hug people - stranger or not, but she didn’t want to make him uncomfortable. She knew from Melody - just bits and pieces of what he had gone through. Instead, she held out a shaky hand. “It’s very lovely to meet you,” she said, continuing to smile at him.

Not even ten seconds later, Tobias was rushing them into the house. “Listen,” he said, staring at Melody and Ailey. “This is… this is something that could get us into an incredible amount of trouble. Like… Azkaban trouble,” he said, his dark eyes wide as he glanced between the three of them. “We need to hide our wands… away from here… off my property. They have ways, to track, and I can’t be… we can’t be caught.” Ailey watched as he looked at Mordred, obviously thinking and scared of the worse. Last Ailey knew, Melody wanted to keep this away from the Ministry - which Ailey supported 100%.

Ailey opened her mouth, seeing a rather large gap in the plan, but Tobias seemed to sense it. “You need a wand, I know… well… I also know a person,” he avoided eye contact with Ailey as he spoke, “That can get us wands… behind the back of the Ministry.” No. There was no way. Ailey shook her head at Tobias, but she knew what needed to be done… this was for Melody and her brother… Melody who had been there every step of the way with her babies… Melody who was there whenever Jasper was being an ass (which, was frequently). Her Melody who was there during the Triwizard Tournament…her best friend, her sister…

“Where is Jack?” she asked, feeling her heart flutter in her chest.

Mordred felt his heart racing in his chest. This was it. It was time. Melody would finally remember the early years and he would remember things he had possibly forgotten. He didn’t want to tell Melody, but there were things he wanted to forget. He wished they could both forget the whole thing but it consumed both of their lives and it would be impossible to forget. All he wanted to forget was the worst moments. The most painful ones. He could deal with the rest. He shook his head softly to try to stop thinking about the horrible memories swirling through his head. He just wanted them gone.

After what seemed like forever, the door opened. Mordred was happy to see a friendly looking girl who immediately embraced his little sister. He could see just how much love the two of them had for each other. He could tell they were there for each other through anything. The man on the other hand didn’t look as friendly, but Mordred knew he was there to help. He was sacrificing his time just to help the two of them out. It wasn’t his place to judge so he didn’t.

Without warning, Ailey greeted him. He noticed her extend her hand out. He could tell she was nervous- or something was wrong. Normally he hated physical contact but for her it was okay. He didn’t know why but it was. He shook her hand, but shoved his hand into his pocket immediately after. “Nice to meet you too.” He replied with a small voice. He gave his normal nod and small smile back.

Just as quickly as Ailey hugged Melody when the door opened he was being shoved into the house. It made him nervous to be pushed around. He felt himself grab Melody’s arm tightly. He didn’t let go until she placed his hand on his and gave him that warm reassuring smile. He took a deep breath in and put his hand back into his pocket. He stayed close to his little sister and listened as the man spoke. He wanted them to hide their wands. Did that mean they had to give them up? Mordred didn’t understand most of what Tobias was saying. He did know that Azkaban was a kind of wizard prison. Based on the look on Melody’s face it was not a pleasant place. “Do what we need to do. We’ve come this far and we’re not stopping now” Mordred was always shocked at Melody’s determination. He could tell she was trying to be brave but he could see past that. In just the short few months he was around his sister he picked up on most of her social cues.

As usual, he remained silent. He didn’t even know what to say which made it much easier to not speak. He was definitely scared of what was to come. He knew it would be the best thing. He took a subtle deep breath and let it out slowly as the three continued to engage in conversation. He listened to them but still didn’t understand most things that they were saying. Melody was teaching him things but he knew it would take a lot of time to learn. Plus, she was extremely busy with work and her girlfriend, Morgana. He understood. He just wished he didn’t have to miss out on all those years at Hogwarts. He felt weak and vulnerable. Just like he did with Tony. He wondered if it was a feeling that would ever go away.

Melody couldn’t believe this was something Ailey and Tobias were willing to do for her. She knew it wouldn’t be easy. She knew it would be long and probably painful and scary. Melody had a low pain tolerance and definitely feared that. But she knew it would be worth it. She knew it was something that needed to be done. She had gone on for too long not knowing anything about her brother. She knew it would be wonderful to know about the past with him. To share memories with him- good memories before everything happened. Memories with their mother and father who mysteriously died. Melody believed deep down that they were still alive but her gut told her they weren’t. She didn’t know what to believe.

Shortly after the door to the cottage opened, Ailey was embracing her. Melody could feel Ailey’s pain and she held onto her tightly. Melody held her tightly and didn’t let her go until Ailey pulled away. Melody stroked the hair that fell in her face away and wiped away her tears. She smiled softly and held onto her hands. She could feel them shaking. She knew she was going through a lot with Jasper. She wasn’t sure what would happen at this point. What she did know is that whatever happened she would be right by Ailey’s side. “I’ve missed you too.” She said holding back some of her own tears. She never wanted to stop hugging Ailey. It had been too long. Too long.


As usual, her wonderful best friend immediately introduced herself to her brother. Melody was nervous about how Mordred would handle it, but he was quite kind. The physical contact between the two of them shocked her. She had never seen Mordred take on to anyone so quickly. She saw that little sparkle in his eyes which caused her to smile. That sparkle was a rarity, but she usually saw it when she talked about their parents with Mordred. She loved seeing that sparkle in his eye. That meant he felt hopeful. Which was another rarity. She couldn’t stop herself from smiling.

Before she could react much more, she was being shoved into the house by Tobias. She felt Mordred grab her tightly. She grabbed his hand and gave him her warm smile. She immediately felt him calm down. She knew her brother had been through a lot and she hated to think about it. She did the best she could to help him through it but he had hard times. She just wish none of this had happened at all.

The words that came out of Tobias’s mouth shook her. They had to hide their wands. Of course they did. The Ministry couldn’t know about this. The whole point of having her brother back and doing all this was so the Ministry wouldn’t find out. She grabbed her wand and clutched it tightly in her hand. She hated this but she knew it was best. “Do what you need to do. We’ve come this far and we’re not stopping now.” She still didn’t hand her wand over. She was still reluctant. She had to gather up the courage, but she would do it. No stopping. Not now. Not after everything.

“What’s the first step? Melody asked in a serious voice. She was ready to get this started. She was terrified but ready. With sweaty and shaking hands, she held out her wand to Tobias. She had been through a lot with that wand. No one else had ever held it but her. It was always in her sight. She could feel her heart racing as she waited for Tobias to take the wand.

It was obvious to Tobias that Melody and Ailey did not want to hand their wands over. He couldn’t blame them. Once an avid wand user, he could remember how lost he would have been without one. His first ever wand that he got before starting at Hogwarts was now at his mother’s, since then he made it through using others, mostly ones that Jack had made him. What made it all easier was when he spent some time in Japan and trained under a brilliant witch who helped him learn how to cease his reliance on a wand.

Since then, Tobias has felt freer - as if a burden had been lifted from his life. He looked at Melody and Ailey and frowned. “I get it,” he started to say, as he backed away and sat down on the nearest chair. His house was spacious for one person, but he liked it that way. It made him feel less trapped. “I hated leaving mine behind. But you’ll get it back… it’s what we need to do.” He meant no harm in it. Tobias never meant harm in the things he did for the people he didn’t not like - that was to say, if he disliked someone, he definitely felt harmful thoughts - but for those who he didn’t not dislike, well, violence obviously never occurred to him.

He wasn’t completely sure what the Ministry was capable of, but what he did know was that it was more than he could ever imagine. He hated that. Wands - they were a method of control, a way to force witches and wizards to think in ways their government wanted them to think in. It was just one of the many complaints he had about the Ministry of Magic… and why he would never return to live in Britain again.

Tobias was mostly patient, but he was also very eager to get those wands far away from his house. Ailey was the first to hand hers over, all the meanwhile asking for Jack. Of course. Where was he? It was an excellent question since Jack too was usually on the move. He had a permanent home in Spain with his wife, though, making money by crafting artisan wands for local witches and wizards. Tobias had already been in touch with him… there was nobody in the world he trusted more than Jack and Ailey, and he knew that Jack would never speak a word of Mordred and Melody to anyone. “On his way tomorrow,” he said, knowing that Jack was at home with his wife and infant son.

Melody then handed her wand over and Tobias took it, casting her a the most kind smile he could muster. “I’m sorry,” he told her, as he took them both in his hands. “I promise you will have it back. It’s what we have to do.” He stood up with both wands in his hand and walked to the door, knowing that Melody’s question was better for Ailey. Putting an overcoat and a hat on his head, he kept his hand on the doorknob to say his last few words: “I can’t show you where they are going, but they will be safe. I promise.”

Ailey watched as Tobias took their wands and left. She stared at him, wishing she could get into his mind and know what he was thinking. Where he was going. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust him… it was more so that she didn’t know how to function without her wand. It would be a long day, waiting for Jack to arrive and craft them new ones.

She bit her lip as the door shut and then turned to Melody and Mordred. Without really thinking much of it, she clasped her hands in front of her, a mannerism she had picked up from Jasper. As soon as he crossed her mind, she unclasped her hands and crossed them over her chest.

“Next,” she said confidently with a nod, pacing around the room to get a better look at it. Although disheveled from the outside, it was quite nice on the inside. The walls were painted a soft, mint green, and he had leather furniture - dragon leather, from the looks of it. There was a lot of light coming in, despite the little amount of windows. Ailey knew how much Tobias liked the openness of certain spaces.

“Next,” she said again, before sitting down on the couch and looking around the room. “When Tobias wrote to me, he said he would have rooms together for us… we could settle in, first, take showers. This… this works best if we are as relaxed as possible… so,” she reached into her bag - much smaller on the outside than it was on the inside, and extracting three bottles: one was a bottle of Firewhiskey, the other was a potion for calming nerves, and the third was one for a restful sleep. She placed them on the table in front of her with a light clunk before reaching back in and pulling out two pieces of parchment and quills.

“I want you to write. Everything that goes through your mind, for an hour each day. It’s not an easy process… it’s not a quick process, but I need you to be able to open your mind and trust yourself and then trust me.” She knew that wouldn’t be difficult for Melody, but for Mordred, that was going to be the biggest challenge, she assumed.

“There will be a lot of talking which is why I have this,” she added on, pointing to the fresh bottle of Firewhiskey. It was brought to her and Jasper as an engagement gift from Chester, but it wasn’t being used and she doubted Jasper had even noticed it was there.

She sat back on the couch and continued biting her lip. She was trying her best not to think about him, but it was so hard. Ailey loved Jasper very much… but he wasn’t making life any easier. Most days she felt like a single mother, while he went out and stayed at work extra long, then stayed at his “loft” that he wanted to keep. This moment wasn’t about Jasper - it was about Mordred and Melody, and she wanted to be the best friend that she could be.

Her eyes looked up at Melody and Mordred and patted the seats beside her. With a small smile, she spoke again. “This isn’t going to be easy. I am here for you, no matter what. If you decided part way through that it’s too much, then tell me. Neither of you are a burden,” she looked at Melody as her eyes filled with tears and then turned to Mordred. “Anyone that Melody loves, I love too. I promise to do whatever I can to make you remember.”

Mordred watched as his sister gave her wand to Tobias. He could tell she hated it and that broke his heart. Again, most of what Tobias said my little to no sense to him. He assumed Melody would explain once they were a little more settled. He had so many questions. Who was Jack? Why did they have to give their wands away? When would Tobias be back? Did witches and wizards using different wands than they are used to affect their magic? What was going to happen over the next few days? He kept his mouth shut not wanting to ask Melody yet. He didn’t even know if she knew the answers but he had faith in her.

After Tobias left, he watched Ailey pace of the room for a moment. He could tell something was on her mind. He hated to think that she was sad. He felt such a kind and strong vibe coming off of Ailey and he liked it. He followed Melody as she sat on a couch separate from Ailey. Mordred sat close to Melody and listened to Ailey as she spoke. She took three bottles out from a very small bag. He took a moment to try and figure how they even fit in there. Mordred looked down at Melody. Just as he did, he noticed all the color leave her face. He eyes were locked and focused on the biggest bottle Ailey pulled out. He didn’t know what it was but he could tell something was very off. He grabbed her hand and held it. She was shaking. Mordred saw her force a smile and look back at Ailey.

She also pulled out two pieces of parchment. Mordred was very untrusting, but seeing the love between Melody and Ailey made him feel more comfortable about writing down his thoughts. There was a lot that went through his head and it wasn’t good. He didn’t want people to know about it. Especially Melody. There were things he didn’t tell her. He never planned on telling her. He told her a lot but some things were best kept to himself. Unfortunately, he knew that Ailey had to know. She had to know anything and everything in order to help.

That’s when it hit him- a complete stranger was doing this for him. Someone who he had never met was sacrificing her time and life just to help him. Mordred thought back to the day when he woke up in St. Mungo’s after Melody saved him. During this time, he was still unconscious but he could hear and make out almost everything that was going on. He was lying in bed when she suddenly ran away without an explanation. She was gone for quite a while. He worried. He worried a lot. Melody hadn’t left his side until that moment and he feared he did something wrong. He tried to wake up but he couldn’t yet. He was still too weak. He felt stuck. When she returned she was filled with hope and happiness. He heard her crying tears of happiness and talking to someone about her best friend having twin baby girls. He heard her say she was once again filled with hope to see how precious life was.

When his flashback ended, he looked at Ailey with a slight head tilt. Was that her? Was she the one that had those twin baby girls? He didn’t doubt it. He knew in that moment that he was looking at the girl that motivated his little sister to keep trying. To have hope in even the darkest of situations. He couldn’t help but smile a little. In a way, she had helped save his life. He knew that Melody and Ailey were important to each other. He wondered what else they had been through together.

He watched Ailey and Melody as they talked back and forth. He didn’t want to say much. Melody asked most of the questions he had so he kept his mouth shut and listened. He couldn’t get over the kindness Ailey was showing. He could tell she was battling something but that didn’t stop her from doing this for them. Mordred hoped to discover love like that someday.

Melody hated everything that was happening in that moment. Well almost everything. She loved having Ailey and Mordred around her. She hated that her wand was gone with some mysterious man and that she was in a new place. She knew how much Ailey trusted Tobias and that made her trust him.

She sat down on a couch to listen to Ailey speak. Mordred sat close to her which she liked. Melody agreed. It was best if they were calm. She felt her heart race as Ailey stopped mid-sentence and reached into her bag. Did she bring potions or something? Melody hated to rely on potions for things. Most people found it ironic that Healer hated potions but she did. She didn’t know why but she did. She felt her blood run cold as she saw a bottle of Firewhiskey sitting in front of Ailey. She would have to drink. Many horrible memories came flooding back to her. Her eyes stung with tears but she quickly pushed them away. She choose to do this. It was her decision and she wasn’t backing out because of fear.

“How is this going to work?” Melody asked trying to remain as calm as possible. She wasn’t sure exactly what was going to happen. How much would she drink and when? When would she take the calming draught? Melody felt her heart sink again when Ailey said it wouldn’t be easy. She knew that but just how hard was this going to be. How much were Ailey and her friends sacrificing for this? Was she really worth all that? What would the next few days bring? She had many many questions for Ailey, but she knew she would most likely answer most of them before she could ask them. Ailey always seemed to know what was on Melody’s mind.

Melody looked up at Mordred who was in deep thought. His eyes were locked on focused on Ailey. She watched him for a few moments and then a smile formed on his face. She wondered what he could possibly be thinking. What was going through his head? Why was he smiling at her best friend? Melody felt like that was all that was going through her head was questions. Questions about everything.

She tried to hold her next question back, but she couldn’t. She was too afraid. “Just how much are we going to have to drink?” She felt tears sting her eyes again. She hated to think that she would be willingly drinking again. She always had such bad experiences with it but she knew it was for the best. It relaxed her and that’s what was needed for this. Along with the calming draught and good night’s sleep, hopefully this wouldn’t be as bad as she imagined but she doubted it.

Her thoughts wandered to Morgana. Melody had once again failed to tell Morgana where she was going and what she was doing. She knew Morgana would come in a heartbeat if she could but she didn’t want her to see her in this much pain. She didn’t want her to see her this scared. Melody was always strong for Morgana as she went through a lot as leader of the Aurors. Melody had been sleeping with more often as her dreams were getting worse and worse. She often found herself sneaking into her bed at night just be safe. She hated that couldn’t tell Morgana things like that. She hated that it pained her so much. All she told her was that she was at St. Mungo’s and she didn’t know when she would be returning home. She hoped and prayed Morgana didn’t go to try and find her. She would be caught in a lie and that could go downhill very quickly. She found herself holding the necklace that Morgana gave her. She never took it off. She felt a little comfort from that.

She brought her attention back to Ailey. Her heart filled with love. Her best friend sacrificed so much for her. She couldn’t imagine how hard it was for her to be here right now. To leave those little girls back at home must have been almost impossible. She loved her best friend with her whole heart. She still never understood why she was deserving of so much love. She couldn’t imagine life without Ailey. Ailey was the most important person in her life and she loved her very much. She knew she would have to repay Ailey for everything that was going to happen over the next few days or however long this took. Melody would give Ailey the world if she could.

The moment he left his cottage, Tobias fell against a tree trying to catch his breath. The suddenness of Ailey back in his life was one thing, but the appearance of two strangers in his house was something completely different. What if someone got a hold of them and gave them veritaserum, forcing them to spill everything. If anything at all was told to the Ministry, all that Tobias, Jack, Jamison, even Ailey to an extent - and countless others would be a waste. They had to do what was necessary to take the Ministry down… it was important.

For years Tobias never managed to let emotions get in his way. It was why when he and Ailey did what they did so many years ago, that he never furthered their intimacy. If twenty-six year old him had the wisdom that he had now, everything would be different. He would have left the group and stayed at Ailey’s side, determined to make change in a better way, one with love instead of hate.

But that wasn’t how it was. Nothing ever turned out the way it was meant to. Wasn’t that part of the excitement of being alive?

Tobias’s dark eyes opened wide as he stared ahead into the forest.

His hands were shaking with the two wands held tightly in his fist. He looked down at them, thinking of everything that the wands had been through with the two women in his house. They were as much a part of them as a vital organ - without it, what were they? It pained him to take the wands from them, but there was no choice… if the Ministry knew…

He couldn’t let that happen. Something had to be done to prevent anyone from finding out. Not only would their lives be at risk and they most definitely would end up in Azkaban - after countless amounts of torture, but the work would be futile and the Ministry would be just as corrupt as ever, if not… even more.

Two ideas sprang into Tobias’ head. He knew what he had to do. He held his hands in front of his face to watch the shaking as he processed what was happening. Everything was going so fast… he was having trouble keeping up. But it had to be done. Without further ado, Tobias turned on the spot and landed somewhere far away, somewhere on the border between Germany, Switzerland, and Austria.

Ailey’s eyes glazed over as she fiddled with the parchment and the quills. What she was about to do would require her to open her mind as well and to spill her thoughts. Without a clear conscious, it would be impossible to do. There was a lot she hadn’t told Melody about her relationship with Jasper, or really anyone for that matter - and she wasn’t sure if she was ready to talk about it. But it had to be done. This was for Melody and for Mordred.

She put the parchment and quills delicately on the table and sat back on the couch just as Mordred and Melody sat down. Instinctively, Ailey reached into her pocket to grab her wand but it was not there. There was a brief moment of panic before she remembered that Tobias had it… wherever he was. This made her feel vulnerable and naked, but there was nothing she could do… like her thoughts, it had to be done.

Clearing her throat she sat forward again. It wasn’t surprising that Melody was doing all of the talking. Mordred had been through more than any human should ever have to go through in their life… social interactions must seem so strange to him. What they were saying about wands, potions, and memories was probably so confusing. This thought made her frown. What was it like, to be stuck in between worlds and lives? The thought filled her eyes with tears, she had been extra vulnerable since the birth of her daughters.

She decided it was best to slow down and explain it all to him, so he wasn’t more lost than he already was. Her pale eyes looked from Melody to him and she gave him a sad smile, sad that their world had such cruelty in it. Ailey’s brain would never be able to fathom why anyone would want to hurt another person. Trying to keep her thoughts clear, she picked up the brand new bottle of Firewhiskey and drummed her fingers against the glass. “This,” she said, as her voice started to crack a bit from all of her stress, “Is Firewhiskey. It’s a liquor that is popular among witches and wizards in Britain and Ireland,” she continued on, although Ireland had much better whiskey than Firewhiskey. But now wasn’t the time to say that.

“We have it because it’s going to help us calm our nerves and open up. This,” Ailey’s small hands pointed at the middle bottle - a vial filled with a soft blue liquid floating slowly around. “Is what we call a Calming Draught. It’s used to soothe nerves, it’s a potion - but I made this one, so you can guarantee it’s safe.” She wouldn’t trust it any other way. Ailey then pointed to the third bottle, a vial of midnight blue liquid that sat in a solitary state. “This was made by my sister for my fiance and I after our daughters were born. It’s to help sleep… which I am sure after these next few days, we will all need.”

She picked up the last vial and stared into it. There were specks of glitter in it, to make it look as if it was a night sky. Jasper would probably be looking for it whenever he got home, but Ailey didn’t care. He could figure out another way to sleep. Muggles did it all the time. She put the bottle back down and looked back at Mordred. “This is all confusing, I am sure, but please… if you have any questions or concerns, it’s so important to ask. This is all about you, after all, and we’re in all in it together. It’s best to get it all out there.. I know how hard it is, but… it’ll get better. I promise.”

At that moment Melody asked her first question. Ailey knew how much alcohol had caused a problem for her best friend, months ago - when Ailey first found out she was pregnant. It was when Melody first tried to extract Mordred… and Ailey found her, on the floor of her office, in the worst state that Ailey had ever seen her in. It was the most heartbreaking experience ever. And although it might not seem like it to them now, so much progress had been made since then. A year ago what was their current reality was an impossibility.

“Not a lot,” Ailey whispered kindly. She reached forward, across the table to grab hold of her best friend’s hand. “Just enough to talk, that’s it. I will be here for you, it won’t get out of hand. Ok?” Her eyes met Melody’s. She wanted her to know how important she was to her and how she wouldn’t let anything go wrong.

Mordred listened carefully to Ailey as she explained what everything was. Firewhiskey. It sounded dangerous. Something that “opened up their minds and made it easier to talk” scared him. What was it going to do to him. Anything with the word fire in it always made him nervous, but it was okay for consumption and he had to drink it, he would do it. As long as Melody did, of course. He wouldn’t do anything she didn’t do. He could still see Melody’s was visibly nervous about it. He had never seen her so pale. He put his arm around her for a few moments just to help her calm down.

The next thing Ailey pointed too was the middle bottle. A Calming Draught. Mordred had plenty of those in St. Mungo’s while he was recovering. Melody wouldn’t let him be without it until he felt comfortable. He knew what those did and they were quite nice. He just remembered how hard it was not to take one after the full effects wore off. He was willing to do it again if he had to.

His thoughts wandered to just how bad this was going to be. If they needed alcohol and two potions to try and help get them through this… what was going to happen to them? He felt his heart start pounding in his chest. Maybe magic was more complicated than he thought. Maybe there was more to it than he imagined. He dug his hands into his pockets which was a sign of nerves for him. He tried to make it is as subtle as possible to not worry Melody. He felt relief when she didn’t notice. He didn’t need to worry her right now.

The next thing Ailey explained to Mordred was something that would help him sleep. Mordred felt a huge lump form in his throat. He hated anything that put him to sleep. He refused any kind of thing like that while at St. Mungo’s. He didn’t want to be forced into sleep. He shook his head softly but didn’t speak until Ailey was done speaking. He didn’t want to interrupt her- especially after she was being so kind and explaining everything to him.

He felt a few tears sting his eyes and she told him to ask if he had any questions. He could tell Ailey really cared. For the first time, his fear about all of this really surfaced. He swallowed the lump in his throat and spoke softly. “I promise you I will ask if I have any questions.” The truth was, Mordred had many questions. He just didn’t want Melody to hear them. He wanted to ask Ailey in private.

After the fear left, he felt something new. He wasn’t quite sure what it was. He seemed to trust Ailey enough to want to talk to her privately. He had never had that feeling outside of Melody. Although, it felt a little different from the feelings he had with Melody. He didn’t understand it. He sat for a few moments to try and figure it out, but couldn’t. He shrugged it off. It was probably a one time thing. Most positive feelings were with him.

He jumped slightly when Melody slightly nudged him. He looked down at her. He felt bad for zoning out. “Sorry?” He said. “Are you okay with that?” Mordred blinked trying to think of the question he had been asked prior to that, but he didn’t hear it all. “Okay with what?” He asked. “You will have to take at least a little of sleeping potion. I promise it will help. Please.” Mordred looked into those beautiful blue eyes. He could see the whites of her eyes turning red as she held back tears. Mordred knew Melody really cared for him but this was something he couldn’t do. He shook his head. He hated to say no to his sister, but he couldn’t take that potion. Anything else, but not that.

Melody watched as Ailey explained everything to Mordred. She loved that she could tell he was nervous and confused. She felt herself shaking when Ailey talked about the Firewhiskey. She was dreading that more than anything. More than the pain she would have to go through. More than the pain Mordred would have to go through. Well, Ailey was doing a lot too. She was going through a lot. Maybe she didn’t dread the Firewhiskey over anything. She didn’t. She dreaded Ailey having to do this more than anything. Maybe this wasn’t the right decision. It was too late to back out now. She felt tears sting her eyes. She sniffed softly and brushed the tears away. She felt Mordred wrap his arm around her. She moved in a little closer to him and wiped away a few more tears.

Melody took a moment to think about all Ailey had done for her. Ever since they first met outside the Ravenclaw Common Room during her first year almost 15 years ago. Melody was having a rough time that night. She was struggling to make friends. But her kindness and compassion broke her out of her shell and made her who she was today. Ailey was there for her when she was nervous about her sisters attending Hogwarts and being away from her parents. Ailey was there when Melody’s sister was diagnosed with Spattergriot and was in St. Mungo’s for months. Ailey was there when Melody mysteriously lost her parents. Ailey was there when Melody was missing Morgana after she graduated. Ailey was there when Melody was in her office drunk and torn. Ailey was there for this. Ailey was there for everything. Melody felt her heart swell with gratitude and appreciation. Ailey was always there. And she knew she always would be.

Melody felt more tears sting her eyes as Ailey took her hand. She couldn’t stop herself from getting off the couch and hugging her tightly. Her heart was pounding and she could feel herself starting to cry. She tried to hold back the tears but they wouldn’t stop flowing. She was terrified. She tried so hard not to cry because she knew Ailey was going through a lot as well. Ailey said she was never a burden but she had a hard time believing that. Something seemed very off with her bestest friend and she feared what it could be.

She took a deep breath and finally pulled away from Ailey. She forced out the best smile she could and grabbed her hands. “I love you. Thank you for doing this.” She said sincerely. She felt her voice shaking and tried to stop it by taking a big breath in. “It means alot to me and Mordred. Especially since you’re going through so much too-” She started to choke up. What did she do to deserve someone so amazing in her life?

Melody pulled away and forced out a laugh- which she often did after crying to try and lighten the situation. “What’s the next step?” Melody asked curiously. She hated just sitting there and doing nothing. Her nerves were a wreck and she had to do something.

Tobias reappeared an hour later at the door of his cottage. He felt guilty taking their wand from them, but he knew it had to be done. Just as he reached out his hand, he paused. A whistling of the wind against the leaves could be heard behind him. He knew, as his hand hovered in front of the door, that nothing would ever be the same again. The young man listened to the whistling of the winds... it was if they were pushing him forward, encouraging him to do what was necessary and what was right.

Biting his lip, Tobias held his hand up and knocked on the door before announcing himself. He didn’t want to worry anyone on the other side. Holding his hand up, the door slowly swung open and he walked back in. Ailey was on his right sitting down on a couch, while Melody and Mordred sat beside each other on another. Tobias waved his hands around and watched as his overcoat and hat undressed themselves from him and floated lazily to the coathanger.

He then sat down beside Ailey, far enough away to give her space, but close enough that he could be a part of the conversation. In front of her were three bottles. He recognized all of them. Once, a long time ago, he went through this with Ailey and a Muggleborn wizard who had been victim to the former Ministry’s strict laws. Back then it wasn’t as illegal or frowned upon, but a lot had changed with the Ministry - the former Minister of Magic - Anya, made life very difficult. They were now in an interim period and he doubted that much had changed.

It seemed to be an intense moment - Mordred was refusing the sleeping potion. It wasn’t a necessity, but it was highly encouraged… without it, horrible nightmares would happen and it would make Ailey’s work more difficult. But he was going to leave Ailey to have that discussion with him. It wasn’t his place. His dark eyes watched as Ailey spoke next to Melody. She reached out her hand and clasped it around her friend’s - the beautiful redhead, who was the nervous man’s sister. His gaze then turned to Mordred, who was looking at Ailey with a look that was all too familiar… or at least what he thought it was. He could not help but smile.

After Melody and Ailey exchanged some words that were a bit too emotional for his liking, he knew it was his time to speak. He sat forward and tugged on his tie.

“I’ve been thinking,” he announced, looking from Ailey, to Melody, and then to Mordred. “We’re obviously putting ourselves in the path of danger by doing this. The consequences if caught would be unfathomable. There’s only one thing we can do to prevent anything from leaving this house.” By the look on Ailey’s face, he knew she was catching onto what he was saying. But it had to be done. They had to do this… he hated to put any of them in such a position, but the consequences were far worse than the setbacks of it.

He decided to wait to suggest his second plan.

It wasn’t surprising to Ailey that Mordred would refuse the sleeping potion. She knew the present moment wasn’t a time to discuss it. Right now the most important thing was laying all of the plans on the table and talking. Talking as much as possible. Ailey doubted she would get to any spell work for the next few days. She would need her wand from Jack (which opened up another bucket of worms) and she would need to clear her own mind. Mordred and Melody would have to talk with her together and alone. It was going to take a lot of trust and a lot of time, but she was willing to do it. Although her heart panged as she thought about Shiloh and Ceres back at home, she knew they were in the best of hands.

“I love you so much,” Ailey said to Melody, tracing her thumb over her hand in a coaxing pattern. She hated that she was in pain and would do anything to try and fix it. Ailey heard a squeak from the couch behind her; emotions always made Tobias uncomfortable. She had to suppress a smile, knowing that the moment was very serious - but she could not help but find it funny that some things just never changed.

“I will be okay, I promise… I have you,” she added on with an optimistic nod. And it was the truth. Everything hurt in her life, but she knew she wasn’t alone. She had Melody, her sister, Peter, Carina… there was so much love around her. She gave a slight squeeze to Melody’s hands before sitting back and turning to Tobias, who was readying to speak.

The words that came out of his mouth stunned her. “No way.” She shook her head. The Unbreakable Vow? Never in her life had she used it nor had she ever thought about it. It was always too extreme. “I’m a mother! I have two infant daughters at home and a family, I can’t… I can’t…” But she knew why he was saying what he did. If the Ministry were to find out and one of them caught, there was absolutely no branch of magic that could get any information out of them. Mordred would be safe - all of their information, all of their secrets that were about to spill, would be safe forever.

She sat back and ran her hand through her wavy hair, biting the nails on her other hand. It was a lot of thinking and this was just the first night.

Mordred noticed Tobias enter but didn’t pay much attention to him. He felt nervous without Melody by his side but he knew she couldn’t always be there. He knew she couldn’t stay by his side forever. As much as it pained him, they would go their separate ways one day and not see much of each other. He knew it wouldn’t be for a long time but the day would come and he dreaded it. After spending so much with Melody after being alone all those years, it was hard to be alone again. He spent a lot of sleepless nights tossing and turning in his bed. He hoped he could find the strength to be independent.

Tobias finally broke the silence by talking about something Mordred once again didn’t understand. Based on the way both Melody and Ailey reacted it wasn’t anything good. He sat in a panic. What was going on? Why were both his little sister and her best friend so terrified? Mordred watched as Melody quickly made her way over to him and sat close. Melody took his hands and began to explain what they were talking about. It took her quite a while as she was overwhelmed with tears.

When Melody finally finished explaining, Mordred pulled her into a hug. He wasn’t quite as affected as the two girls were. He had been in the face of danger his whole life. He was used to it. Sure, he wanted to escape but as long as he never breathed a word of this he would be fine. He was good at keeping secrets. He kept his letters secret for 18 years- he could keep this a secret for the rest of his life. Easily.

Mordred kept his focus on his little sister as she wept into his shoulder. He kept his arm around her tightly. He could feel the pain radiating off her. It was like a hot furnace. He didn’t know exactly how to comfort her, but he did the best he could. He did things that she would do when he was upset. Lots of hugs, warm smiles, and reassuring words. “You know we have to do this, Mel. It will be okay.” Mordred whispered softly. “You’ve made it through so much worse. You can make it through this.” His words didn’t calm Melody down much but he knew she was really struggling. He just continued to hug her tightly and let her cry.

Mordred hated to see these girls living with so much fear. They both reminded him of a certain part of his time with Toby. Melody reminded him of the times where he felt scared and hopeless. Those times came quite often to him. Everytime he worked hard to escape and was caught, things got worse. Tony got meaner and harsher. He felt hopeless for days and days on end. He felt scared as things happened quite unexpectedly over the course of a few weeks. He never had peace. When he did have peace, it was because Tony forced it on him. As he looked down at his little sister, he saw that same look in her eyes. Pure fear and regret- even though the decision that was made was the right one.

Ailey reminded him of his nurturing side. Mordred didn’t look like it, but he was extremely protective. He often looked scared and weak. He may have been physically weak, but when it came to protecting and caring for those he cared about he found strength. He didn’t know where it came from but he always found it. Physical, emotional, or both. He saw that in Ailey. He saw the love and care she had for everyone. Mordred loved that in Ailey. He promised himself that he wouldn’t let anything happen to Ailey. She was sacrificing so much in that moment and would be sacrificing much more. He would never let anything happen to her.

Mordred looked at Tobias with a concerned look on his face. “How does this work exactly?” Mordred was worried about how something this powerful, dangerous, and scary would work. He imagined it wasn’t easy but maybe it was. He didn’t know anything. He hoped to receive some answers. He was slowly starting to trust Tobias less and less. He looked down at his sister who was still sobbing and Ailey who seemed absolutely devastated and overwhelmed. Did they make the right decision to do this? Was this really something they wanted to go through just to remember? Mordred started to second guess things but it was far too late to stop now.

“I love you too. So much” Melody felt her heart soar a little. There were moments with Ailey that would just live with her forever. Melody always felt so comforted by Ailey and she hoped she could do the same for her. She loved her best friend with her whole heart. “And you’ll always have me.” Melody replied with a smile. Melody couldn’t imagine life without her best friend. She hated to think about it so she didn’t. Ailey would always be a part of her life.

Melody was a little unhappy that Tobias cut off her moment with Ailey, but there wasn’t anytime to waste. She listened to him as he spoke. It took a little bit of time for what he said to sink in, but once it did she completely broke on the inside. The Unbreakable Vow. She didn’t even think about that being a possibility of this having to be a thing. Ailey was of course distressed about it. Melody grabbed her hand and held it tightly.

Melody looked over at Mordred who seemed extremely nervous. She knew she had to explain to him about the situation. It was scary. It was terrible. It had to be done. Melody walked over to Mordred and sat down next to him. The instant she sat down she felt tears stream down her face. She was about to change her brother’s life- again. This time for the worse. She wanted to protect him and keep him away from danger. Not put him in the face of it. She should have thought about all before letting Mordred agree to all of this.

She knew she wasn’t going to calm down anytime soon, so she talked through her tears. “It’s something called the Unbreakable Vow.” Melody felt more tears stream down her face. She took a few moments to try and breathe before speaking again. “We will make a vow to never speak of anything said.” Melody’s voice cracked. She cried again for a few long moments before she could talk again and have Mordred understand her. “If we speak of it at all, we’ll… we’ll die.” Melody could barely get those words to come out of her mouth. Her brother lived in fear of death every single day and now it was happening again. Why did this have to happen to him? Why couldn’t his life just be normal?

Melody felt Mordred pull her in close. She completely broke down. She hated to be so weak in front of him. She shouldn’t be acting this way. Everyone in that room was going through a lot and she felt extremely selfish. She just couldn’t stop crying. Her thoughts were locked and focused on her future. She couldn’t tell Morgana about any of this without losing her life. She couldn’t tell Morgana that she might die at any moment if something accidentally slips from her mouth. She had to keep it a secret. She knew this would be such a hard secret to keep. If keeping a secret about Mordred was hard, then this would be impossible. What had she gotten herself into? She hoped it wasn’t Azkaban. She wouldn’t be able to live with herself if everyone ended up there. It would be all her fault. It was something she couldn’t think about.

After explaining all of his thoughts, he suddenly found himself standing and pacing around the first floor. It was a force of habit that made him peer outside the windows, making sure that nobody was around. During the three years he had lived there, not one person had come near his property. One day a wailing sounded throughout and he prepared himself to fight someone off - but all it was, was a deer who had got stuck between a large rock and a tree. He heightened his security that day, but only after saving the creature.

It was a risk opening his home to two people he didn’t know - but Ailey said they could be trusted, therefore he had no choice but to trust them.

He continued to pace as he ran his hands through his hair and tried to steady his breathing. “It will all be ok,” he told himself, over and over. He was never very good with emotions and he found it difficult to figure out where everything made sense.

Suddenly, Ailey spoke out about having a family and babies…  two babies. He had no idea. Dropping his hands down to his side, he gazed at her through new eyes. Ailey… a mother? He knew she was fostering Peter… but she gave birth? The Ailey he knew never wanted children or a fiance.

At that moment an image passed through his mind of another time, in another universe with Ailey by his side. She would have made a good partner, someone that knew and agreed with the way he viewed the world. But her life was now that of a stranger’s, something that was just a speck of dust in the long history of the world.

“You’re a mother?” He asked, walking over to her with a frown. “Since when?” Tobias carefully sat down beside her again. She was risking all of her life for this? It made him stare at her with a newfound respect.

“Since the 27th of May.” When she spoke, he could not help but notice that something was off and that she seemed sad. But it was not his place to poke around and figure things out. However, he also knew what this memory alteration consisted of and that everything would come forward sooner than later. Although he wasn’t the best at being present for people who were struggling, he always wished the best for them.

He then turned his attention to Mordred who was asking how everything was going to work. He observed the man - unsure of all the details he had gone through, but he knew it was bad and he was determined to help find the people that did this and serve them justice. As he thought that, his fists clenched inside the pockets of his blazers. Anyone that hurt another human being, just because, was not a good person.
“Tomorrow, Jack Boot -” he paused and looked at Ailey, who was staring at the ground with her legs crossed. “-will be here. He’s coming to craft wands for Melody and Ailey, but he will also serve as Bonder - who helps seal the vow. Tonight I suggest you listen to whatever Ailey suggests you do… it’s not going to be an easy few weeks..”

He didn’t mean the words to sound rude, but he was someone whose intention was to not waste anytime. He doubted they would do that though. The seriousness of the situation was clear, he could sense it in the tension on their faces and they way they carried themselves. He pulled his hands out of his pockets and twisted them on his lap, watching as Melody and Mordred talked. He looked out of the corner of his eye at Ailey, who still sat back, dumbfounded. He wished there was a way to fix everything, but he knew it was futile.

She thought of her daughters, only five months old and innocent as they lay in their cribs back in their nursery. What were they doing at that moment? Was Jasper with them, singing them a song? Despite all of his fallacies, he was a great father. That was something she could never deny. She wondered if he was thinking about her… if he wondered where she was or what she was doing.

Ailey fiddled with her ring as she sat there, watching Melody explain everything about the Unbreakable Vow to Mordred. She could only imagine how difficult it was to go from one horrible situation and to wake up in a world so different from everything that he used to know. The thought was horrendous, and she wished, more than anything that she could fix it. She glanced at him, watching as he talked with Melody. There was an obvious whisper of pain behind his light eyes, but there was something else too… an inner strength and an inner flame. She found herself staring too long and shook away her thoughts, when he turned and spoke to Tobias.

She felt her cheeks turning a bright red. Deciding to look as if she found something behind him interesting, she stood up and walked across the room to look at a portrait on the wall. It was an old one, but one she recognized - one that hid in a box somewhere in her home with Jasper. In the photo she was seventeen years old, fresh out of Hogwarts. Beside her was Jack, holding onto her hand tightly with a happy face. His arms were bandaged and he stood on crutches, this was months after his horrible accident in the Triwizard Tournament. On the other side of Jack was a young and handsome Tobias, smiling as he clutched onto a book - most likely on social revolutions or something academic from Karl Marx. Tobias was well versed on Muggle literature and he ate it up like crazy.

She smiled and ran her hand over the photo. She was waving at the camera and kissing Jack’s cheek while he waved a crutch up, laughing at a joke that was probably said by Tobias. What would life be like if Jack never left? It was a silly thought to think, because it was an impossibility, but she often found herself wondering about it.

Tobias was suddenly calling her name and she turned around to face everyone looking up at her. It was time to start. With one last glance at the photograph, she turned on her heel and sat back down with a sigh. Tobias looked at her with an expectant but hesitant worry in his eyes. “Alright,” she said, letting out a deep breath. “I want you to tell me about the last time you cried.”

Mordred continued to hug Melody tightly as she cried. She was finally beginning to calm down. He could feel her breathing starting to slow down and steady. He gently brushed away the strands of hair that kept falling to her face. Her head was buried in his chest. He wanted to cry himself but he still didn’t know much he had to fear. Yes, possible death was scary but he was sure he could keep the secret. He didn’t worry about himself.

That’s when Ailey spoke again. The last time he cried? What kind of cry? A cry like Melody was going through right now or a silent cry? Mordred assumed it was any kind of cry. Mordred unfortunately cried quite often and he had to remember exactly when it was. He was stuck between two situations. He couldn't figure out which one come before which. He sat thinking for a few moments while continuing to hold Melody tightly. Her sobs had stopped for now. She was just trying to steady her breathing.

When Mordred finally figured out which cry was the most recent, he felt his heart sink. This is the one he didn't want Melody to know about. He sat for a few moments and decided if he wanted to lie. He knew it wasn't a good idea in this situation. Ailey was only trying to help. She was sacrificing so much just for him and he couldn't lie. He had to open up and be completely honestly. He took a deep breath before speaking. He knew Melody would not like what she was about to hear.

"It was about two days ago..." Mordred felt his heart sink. Melody instantly stopped hugging him and held back her own tears to focus on him. He couldn't look at her. He felt so ashamed. "It was the middle of the night. I tend to wake up in the middle of the night." Mordred tried to talk as little as possible. He felt completely comfortable around Melody, mostly comfortable around Ailey, but not comfortable around Tobias just yet. "I didn't have any dreams or anything. Those aren't as common as they were now that I'm safe." Mordred went on. He could tell that Melody was clearly upset. He cleared his throat before speaking again. "I just started crying. I don't really know why. I guess I was scared or paranoid?" Mordred had an idea of why he cried. He just didn't want to say it. But he looked at Ailey and knew he had to. "I was lonely. Being alone just... It's hard."

Mordred couldn't bring himself to look at Melody. He knew she would feel upset and guilty. He didn't want to think about it. He felt guilty himself. He choked back a few tears. This was not a time to cry. This was a time to be brave and strong. There was more he knew he needed to say. He just didn't want to say it. He took a moment to try and calm his nerves. "After that, I went for a stroll around Hogsmeade." He heard a small gasp come from Melody. She hated it when he went out alone. "I wandered around for hours just sobbing." He still couldn't look at Melody. All he could do was look down and back at Ailey. He felt comfort while looking at her. "I finally returned home just after sunrise and got a little sleep but not much." He said quickly.

Mordred sat forward on the couch ashamed. He ruffled his hair nervously. Melody was completely out of his sight. He didn't want to look at her. He hated to see disappointment in her eyes. Melody rarely got disappointed around him. She was always so kind and understanding. He couldn't stand to see that look in her eyes directed towards him so he didn't look. He kept his focus on the ground- glancing up at Ailey every now and then.

Melody was finally starting to calm down. Her brother was holding her tightly and she felt safe and protected. She tried her best to steady her breathing as she looked around at her surroundings. She saw Ailey looking at a picture hanging on the wall. She couldn't see if very well, but she could see Jack in it. Melody felt her heart sink every time she thought about what Ailey went through with Jack. It was something that no one should ever have to go through. She wanted to take away all of Ailey's pain. She wanted her best friend to be happy. She could tell something was tearing her up on the inside. She promised herself in that moment that she wouldn't let Ailey out of her sight while she was here.

Before Melody could really take in Ailey's next statement, Mordred started speaking. Shocked she sat up and started listening. He cried only a few days ago? Just a few days ago she was at his flat. He was having a really rough day. Melody had to stay until he fell asleep which was hours. She was there all day. He finally fell asleep shortly after dinner. Exhausted and worried about Morgana, she decided to leave Mordred alone for the night. She hoped it wasn't that night.

As Mordred continued speaking, her heart sunk more and more. It was that night. If she hadn't left, maybe he wouldn't have been so distressed. She knew how awful it was to wake up scared in the middle of the night. It happened to Morgana all the time which is why Melody was sleeping with her 90% of the time. She can't believe she left Mordred alone during a time like that. She didn't know what she was thinking.

The next thing he said made her really upset. He was out alone walking for hours. Melody hated when Mordred went out in the middle of the night. She was okay with it during the day since there were so many people around but what if Tony or one of his minions had been around that night? What if this whole nightmare started again? It could at anytime and then only way Mordred could stay safe was to stay inside during the night. Melody held back tears. Mordred couldn't even look at her. That had only happened one other time and it was when he first got home from St. Mungo's. He was ashamed and felt terrible about everything. Why did his life have to be this way?

After a long moment of silence, Melody knew it was her turn to speak. She took a long deep breath. "The last time I cried besides just now was last night. I knew all this was going to happen and I couldn't bring myself to tell Morgana." Melody knew Tobias would be extremely angry at her for even considering telling her girlfriend what she was doing. "Morgana doesn't know too much about Mordred yet." Melody stopped herself before saying more. She didn't want Mordred to know that she was scared to tell Morgana about him. "All I told her was that I would be St. Mungo's for a crazy amount of time and that I wouldn't know when I would be home." Melody felt more tears form in her eyes. "She understood but I could tell she was worried and I hate to make her worry about me." Melody said holding back more tears. "She goes through so much and I just couldn't..." Melody felt herself shaking once again. She hated this so much. "I told her I couldn't sleep with her that night and she was okay with that I think. I wanted to so bad but I couldn't let her see me this scared and-"

Melody couldn't continue on. She had to compose herself first. She took a few long deep breaths and wiped away more tears before speaking again. "I went to bed and I cried myself to sleep. Silently of course. I couldn't let Morgana hear me. And you all know now that I'm a loud crier." Melody said with a small laugh. "I felt so scared. I wish Morgana was here. I want her to be here but I know she can't. I just hate lying to her. I don't want to cause her anymore pain than she already has."

Melody felt herself starting to cry again. She felt like a selfish baby. She just couldn't stop crying. All her emotions seemed to be slamming down on her. Not just emotions from being scared, but guilt and worry. Guilt because her bestest friend and her brother would have to take an Unbreakable Vow because of her. That was something no one had to live with. They shouldn't have to live with fear of going to Azkaban. No one in this room needed that. She felt like this was all on her. Ailey was obviously going through something horrible and she didn't need this right now. She felt herself start to sob again. Was this really the right decision?

Tobias didn't want to be a part of it all. If there was one thing he was bad at, it was favors. He could never say no to those he cared deeply about - which were a very select few. Although he normally would take the selfish route and choose to stray away from something that caused him to open up or interact with too many people, there was absolutely no way he could say to no to Ailey.

As much as he wanted to jump up and run away from the situation when Ailey asked her question about crying, he knew he had to answer and fully participate. It wasn't just about how important these people were to Ailey. No. There was something peculiar about all of it... something familiar... Mordred's experience, from what little he was told - reminded him of something, but he had trouble placing his finger on it. And he knew that if Ailey was asking him for help that this wasn't something minuscule. It was very serious, very dire, and there was nobody else she could turn to.

He returned to biting the inside of his cheek while he zoned out of Mordred and Melody sharing their stories. As the irony taste of blood returned, he ignored it... there was something about it that reminded him of his humanhood, that he wasn't just some robotic creature meant to hideaway for the rest of his life. That he had purpose... that there was a point to it all. The thought made him feel eerily vulnerable.

It took him a moment to realize that everyone was looking at him. He hadn't even realized that Melody stopped talking. The sound of sobbing broke him free from his tormenting thoughts. He looked up at her curiously as he felt himself starting to clam up. Emotions were difficult. What was he supposed to do? At the same time, he couldn't just sit there as this woman reveled in her pain. He had to move. Tobias stood up and paced around the back of the room where Ailey was just a half hour before. Lifting his hand, he waved it around and watched as a box of tissues floated in front of Melody.

He then turned his back on everyone, knowing that they were waiting for him to speak. Usually words came so easily for him, but now everything seemed to be stuck in his throat. Just as he felt a flare of courage he found himself unable to open his mouth. He could feel the tips of his ears heating up as they usually did when he was embarrassed.

"Take your time," Ailey squeaked from the other side of the room. His back was still turned to to them as he continued chewing on the inside of his cheek. Time. What a peculiar thing. It always seemed to work its ways in at the worst moments of life. Which didn't quite make sense, but when did anything really make sense?

That was when it hit him. "It was two weeks ago. My mother just departed from a weekend visit.I didn't realize it at the time, but she left a letter behind... with a photograph. She knows me better than everyone, so of course she put it where she knew I would find it: in my favorite leather bound book written by a Muggle sociologist." As he spoke he imagined his shaking hands holding the dark brown leather cover. It was written over a hundred years before - a first edition that he managed to find with a little illegal magical help. The gold letters were fading away, but he preferred it like that. There was something beautiful about imperfection. And then he saw it - it was a glint of the fading light as the sun started to lower itself in the western sky.

The tip of an envelope stuck out from the 34th page. His age. It took him two days to open the envelope as it sat on the top of his dresser, staring at him and pleading with his dreary morning soul to open every time he woke. Finally he did. His long fingers carefully tore the top open. A picture fell down to the floor and he reached down to pick it up, ignoring the creaking of the floorboards as he moved about. He held the photograph up in the fading light. His mother and father stood beside each other with his cousin Theodore - a rather miserable man who was two years his age. Theodore was happy in the photograph, however, holding onto a tiny infant as she waved around her little chubby fist. Theodore was taken in by his mother and father when he was fifteen. His father was in Azkaban for committing some of the most atrocious crimes ever.

Tobias wasn't sure whether to smile or cry, so his brain settled on doing both. He explained the photograph to the three people in the room who felt as if they were a million miles away. "I'm always going to be alone, I'll never find love like Theodore... I'll never have the experience of holding my own son or daughter. I'll never hug my father again... it's the life I'm entitled to, the life I deserve all because I want to fix this fucked up world." As he spoke he felt a stinging of tears in his eyes again. He chose not to turn back.